Faeces of a marauding elephant

elephantThis is what a friend “inboxed” me: comrade as for this OECD survey on education paa di33, chai, I smell the faeces of an elephant oo. Of all the countries in the world Ghana was last according to some media houses. Comrade, aaba, how can countries like Central African Republic, Burundi, Somalia, Liberia, Afghanistan, Niger, Burkina Faso, Chad, Djibouti, Lesotho, Yemen and Nepal who rank lowest in the world’s average Human Development Index (HDI) beat Ghana? If you care to know HDI combines information on life expectancy, schooling and income.

My response: trusted and loyal comrade, I understand your point. In fact, the world has a total number of 257 countries. 195 belong to the United Nations; out of these the Vatican City and Palestine are not members of the UN but Observer States. The report, to me, is not a fair representation at all. It is, therefore, a tad ludicrous and ridiculous for anyone to make such an assumption.

I find it difficult to understand why yaanom are misreporting that Ghana’s education system is the worst in the world based on the global school league table in Maths and Science by the Organization for Economic and Development (OECD) using 76 countries.

But comrade, after a careful study of the report, I have realised that yaanom were just being disgustingly mischievous. Out of the 54 countries in Africa only the best five countries were selected for the survey, and out of the 16 countries in West Africa only Ghana was picked. According to records, Ghana has won the three top awards in the West African Secondary School Certificate for the last five years. So, what the OECD report is saying is that Ghana was first in West Africa, fifth in Africa and 76 in the world when it comes to Maths and Science. Even though there is still more room for improvement and government is doing all it can to do that, I don’t think the OECD’s score is that bad as some people want us to believe.

Oooooh, why is this comrade calling? I just answered his inbox message. Folks excuse me, please let me pick this call.

Me: Hello comrade, what again?

Comrade: bro, sorry for the bother, but I can smell another faeces of an elephant.

Me: what is it this time around?

Comrade: I hear the dumsor “virgin” was sponsored to the tune of a whopping hundred thousand Ghana Cedis involving the printing of T- shirts, purchasing of lanterns, torch lights, giving of “soli” and busing of people.

Me: Eiiwoo, comrade, I don’t want trouble oo! Who told you that? This is a serious allegation. Anyway, thanks for stating the obvious; I won’t doubt you oo, Kikikikiki, the faeces of an uppity, intolerant, possessed, marauding and a rabid elephant could be repellantly stinking and nauseous paa. Hehehehe, comrade, I hope you haven’t forgotten the “at all costs” mantra which cost it a lot: the elephant is very desperate and because of this, its risk of making mistakes rises exponentially. Do you remember it trample upon Fantes and Northerners not too long ago?

Comrade: Hahahaha, how can I forget that mantra bro? Kikikikiki, your words, “trampling upon” reminds me of another mantra – all-die-be-die.

Me: I hear dumsor is going to end soon, and you guys are planning a thanksgiving vigil.

Comrade: sharp!

Me: please update me when the time comes; enjoy your evening.

Comrade: I will; please enjoy yours too. Bye.

Me: Hello! Comrade please don’t hang up! Hello, did Iyanya…oops, he’s gone!


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